2005 Workout #9: Sheer Fear and Turnip Gas…

Tonight’s Mapleton workout was really great. Mike-san and I started out by going through the Nidan test basics, which felt generally OK. The first class consisted of the same faster-paced Sensei Brewer workout that we had on Tuesday night with the noteable exception that we had the entire gym instead of the somewhat cramped dojo. This made for a lot more room.

Unfortunately, one of the kids next to me dropped the King Mother of all Turnip Farts, right as Sensei Brewer walked in between us to the other side of the gym. I’m sure he thought it was me, however I am definitely vindicated this time, as it most certainly was not. The second class consisted of an all-sparring extravaganza, where we rotated around and luckily I got on the side of things that was opposite of McCabe-san, Sensei Hartman, and Sensei Brewer.

I don’t know what’s been happening to me the last few days, but my body shifting and distance have just been on. I’m not going to question it too much, however I was met with The Big Humble that happens when one gets across from Sensei Brewer. I cannot read that man. Even with Sensei Hartman you can pick up a glimmer of what’s coming at you sometimes, but Sensei Brewer just gives you that same steely gaze like he knows every technique you’ve ever thrown and there’s nothing you can do about it. Then you try one and he manbeats you for about two minutes, and then he resets and lets you try again.

And for those of you that know of such things: I know what fear is. Fear is getting tired of throwing fake back kicks all night and finally committing to doing one on Sensei Brewer. That’s not fear, you say? Imagine that same scenario, only because he’s used to me faking and coming high, he raises his stance and I kick him squah in the nuts. He mutters something along the lines of “low kick! But it was my fault because I stood up.” But it’s too late, your soul has already preemptively left your body and is watching this from somewhere near the non-functional heaters.

Thankfully he decided to have mercy and ended the class there. Accidents happen, I’m mostly just being melodramatic because it’s kind’ve a funny situation. 🙂 It was a good workout and I feel like it’s doing me good. More tomorrow!