Wow. Never saw that one coming.

I came home from Peoria to several missed calls from Derek. This confused me. I checked my voicemail. He talked to Sensei today and now he has “news.” I hop on the computer to find a few offline messages from Derek.

*sigh* How do I always get involved in these things?

I had another long drawn out chat session (no, the logs are not available) with Derek. It appears that he spoke with Sensei, brutal honesty abounded, and that allowed me a window to drop my baggage and get it addressed. It appears that Olar, like Oedewaldt, had no idea a bad perception existed around him. He thought he was being singled out and ostracized. I gave him a few examples and lead him to see how the perception that he is an arrogant asshole is so easy to draw. I got the shit that was bugging me about him off of my chest. We talked about it, remembered the good times we had training (yeah, there were a few) and things between us are settled.

All of this did not seem to change his opinions of Sensei, the dojo, or anything else. And yet he seems determined to come back to the dojo “just to train.” As a white belt, if need be. I have to admit, I never saw his ego as capable of taking that type of hit.

I overreacted a bit on Tuesday. I will not “bring the fight” to Derek if/when he does decide to come back. I do think, however, it will be important that he get monitored to ensure that he isn’t spreading discord throughout the rest of the belt ranks. If he shuts his gob and is able to just do techniques and not be an ass, I will remain indifferent to him being there. We do have history. He was a pretty good friend while we prepared for Shodan. Then his ego went haywire.

I agree with ‘s recent post about angry people existing in the dojo right now.

It appears that I have personally ignored the “control bad temper and impetuousness” element of the Dojo Kun, and I’m going to start resolving that now. I admit that. I overreacted. I got “rabid”. I fucked up. Lack of respect for people that I consider part of my family really pokes my buttons. Sensei Brewer and Sensei Hartman don’t need my defense, but they will get it. I trust them. They have proven time and time again to be able to keep a level head and react to things and deal with them as they need to be dealt with.

So, in short, I’m good. I’ll be in the dojo like clockwork, I know if Derek shows he has to abide by the Sensei Brewer and Sensei Hartman so the situation is handled. I don’t know how the other black belts are going to take to him being back, but I’m good. Besides, I’ve got Sochin to work on.