How exactly does one remove a futon from his hindquarters?

I am going crazy.

Last night after I got off of work, I headed to the gas station to get gas. I don’t have a large gas tank, and it still cost $15.50 to get filled up. Yikes. After that I head home to get things ready to move into my new place. Simple right? Nah.

My Dad is on the couch (where he often is after work) and so I decided to go in and check my mail quickly and start to gather things up. I don’t know why he was just sitting around, but I notice that the grass is mowed and the yard is cleaned up. Now, I wonder to myself “self, when you have a son, are you going to tire yourself out doing yardwork all day when you know you have to help move him?” The voice in my head that tells me to do things said “nope, dumbass.” Turns out Dad’s voice inside his head tells him otherwise.

So Dad is tired from yardwork, and after sitting around for almost an hour I asked if he was ready to get going on this move. Thats when the yelling began, because obviously he thought that someone else had the keys. This is true, but I mentioned that there was a keybox on the door. Now, with my father you must realize that you never try to explain something to him that he knows about already, so I leave that alone. I figured that his forty years of experience and a sister that is a realtor would lend him to know what a keybox is. (For the indoctrinated, it is a small combination lock box that contains the house keys. Without the special code, you can’t get into the house, but with it you have full access.)

Ten more minutes go by, and I asked when he felt like getting started. Apparently, he didn’t know what a keybox was and proceeded to yell at me that I should’ve explained to him that you can get into the house with the keybox, and why had I wasted an hour, dumbass.

So the move went relatively uneventfully, save the volley of challenges against my intellect as we attempted to maneuver large furniture out of the garage and house. We successfully moved my bed, L-shaped desk, and futon over to the new place. The desk is not reconstituted yet, but I figure we can do that early next week or something.

Since the maintenance man is still at the house today, we opted to not move many of the smaller boxes/appliances since we didn’t want any of them walking away from the place while the oven was getting hooked up. I am going to move the bare essentials over the next few days and then gradually bring the rest of the stuff I need over. The plan is not to overload this small house with crap we don’t need, since the tentative plan is to move out in < 1 year anyway.